I was sitting with my back to them, the two young women sipping iced coffees and talking loudly in the quiet coffee shop. I couldn’t see their faces, but I could hear nearly every word of their discussion. Anyone in the shop could hear their discussion. I tried to absorb myself with my open laptop and stack of books, but then came the sentence that made me drop all pretense of working: “You know, really, I don’t need the Church.”
I could tell by the young woman’s arguments that she was feeling out her faith as a young adult and making her first autonomous decisions about how and when she would follow Christ. She was calling the shots because she was the one who had been annoyed and bothered by the behavior of Christians in the long line of churches she’d attended and left. On the one hand, I was encouraged to hear a person talking in public about following Jesus. On the other hand, I was troubled by her conclusions because they weren’t based on Scripture.
I’ve heard this kind of discussion numerous times. It usually comes with an explanation that churches are full of judgmental hypocrites and that it’s easier just to “do Christianity” solo. Next comes a bulleted list of self-discipleship points: reading devotions, having faith conversations with a family member, watching a particular pastor preach online. It’s more organic this way, more meaningful without being forced to go to church or do it a certain way.
Every time I hear a defense for intentional detachment from the church, I want to hijack the conversation and deliver a warning. I’ve heard this before, and I’ve seen where it leads. Purposeful disconnection from the Church often leads to disconnection from Christ. The justifications for detaching from the church I heard that day in the coffee shop reminded me of a similar conversation I had with a woman when I was in college.
I was working as a dental assistant at the time, and I remember sitting with a patient before a procedure and trying to distract her from the dental work she was about to have. I asked her if she was a believer and when she said she was, I followed up by asking where she attended church.
“Oh, I don’t go to church,” she said. “I worship God on my own. I take walks in the woods or sit by myself and pray sometimes. I don’t need an organized religion to be a Christian.” I pushed back (like a good twenty-year-old college student who thinks she knows everything), “So, how does that work? How do you grow in godliness apart from preaching and teaching and fellowship?” The lady refused to look me in the eye and popped off with a remark about hypocrites and judgmental attitudes. She was angry that I had pressed her on an obviously tender subject. But I’d been taught that believers have the right to question one another and if she wasn’t connected to a local body of believers, who else was going to question her?
Our conversation came to a succinct end when I gently suggested she try to find a church to plug into. She had no intention of aligning herself with other Christians. Neither she nor the coffee shop teenagers are unique. In our culture, an organized approach to Christian faith is touted as archaic, legalistic, disingenuous, even oppressive. Following Christ should be entirely individualistic and tailored to personal preferences. Organic faith is more authentic than one that has expectations, right?
Wrong. The Bible does not allow us to construct our own methods for following Christ. You can’t follow Jesus on your own terms.
The Bible does not allow us to construct our own methods for following Christ. You can’t follow Jesus on your own terms. Share on XHebrews 10 is one of many places in Scripture we can look to for God’s chosen means for our sanctification. He sent Jesus as a propitiation for our sins, and because of His sacrifice on the cross, we have access to the Father. In light of what Christ has done for us, the author of Hebrews says, “let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed in pure water. Let us hold on to the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful. And let us be concerned about one another in order to promote love and good works, not staying away from our worship meetings, as some habitually do, but encouraging each other, and all the more as you see the day drawing near.” (Heb. 10:22-24).
You cannot live disconnected from the body of Christ and faithfully obey that passage. The author of Hebrews goes on in chapter 10 to explain the grave consequences of deliberately sinning. Attempting to follow Christ in ways other than the ones He has given may eventually prove that you are not actually following Christ at all. The warning in Hebrews 10 is shocking for a reason—this is a matter of eternal life and death. The writer calls deliberate disobedience “trampling on the Son of God.” There is no other way to follow Christ, to atone for sins, to belong to Him outside of the way God has given us in the gospel. And as He has given us the gospel for salvation, He has given us His Word, His Church, and His Spirit for our sanctification. Designing our own path for growth in godliness is in opposition to God’s good plan. It is not only disobedient to follow Jesus on your own terms, it’s dangerous.
While we must certainly feed our faith with regular, personal times of prayer and Bible intake, the private aspect of following Christ isn’t all we need. Relying solely on organically grown, self-fed faith that’s disconnected from the body of Christ may eventually lead to falling away from Christ. God designed the plan for sanctification and it absolutely includes the Church. To decide that you can follow Him differently from the way He has prescribed is not only presuming to be wiser than God, it is an equation for failure. It will never go well for you to live your life away from the people of God. I know that sometimes we have bad experiences with the Church, but that doesn’t mean we can toss out God’s design for holiness and growth.
As a pastor’s wife, I’ve watched all sorts of people walk through the doors of our church. The ones who have the deepest affection for Christ are the ones who are quietly faithful no matter how difficult life gets. They show up on the Sundays when life is calm, and they show up when it took every ounce of determination to get there. They show up though they’ve been hurt, misunderstood, or overlooked when the louder, squeakier wheels of the church get the attention. They show up, plug in, submit themselves to oversight, soak in the proclamation of the Word, and engage in fellowship because they understand that God designed the Christian life to be lived in community, not isolation. They don’t circle the wagons at home when trials come; they include their faith community in that circle so that sorrows are shared and burdens are lessened. They understand that as much as they need their church, their church needs them. They view themselves as a vital part of the body, not a consumer who shops elsewhere when preferences aren’t on sale.
We might think that faithfulness to personal aspects of discipleship is sufficient, but there is a connection between active involvement in the local church and personal spiritual disciplines. Weakness in one leads to weakness in the other. Strength in one leads to strength in the other. Who will encourage you to read your Bible, hold you accountable, pray regularly? Who will test your interpretations of Scripture? How will you stir up believers to love and good deeds if you’re not meeting with believers regularly? Who will correct you when you are tempted by false teaching? Who will help carry your burdens when you are suffering? We are not mavericks. We are members of the body of Christ. One body; many members.
Please hear me: we are saved by grace alone through faith alone in Christ alone. But we persevere in that faith with the help of the Church He has given us. The expectations to show up, to read your Bible, to pray, to confess, to hear the Word taught, to worship, to give, to serve—those expectations are for your good because they prevent you from falling away. God’s plan for our sanctification is a good one, even if we make mistakes in our execution of the plan. The Scriptures do not allow for us to design a plan for following Jesus that excludes His Bride.
I wish I could tap that young woman in the coffee shop on the shoulder and tell her the truth. I wish I could go back and plead with the woman in the dental chair. I wish I could grab hold of every person I’ve watched slowly fade from church life. Yes, you do need the Church. She is not perfect, but she is God’s gift to you for your good and for His glory. She is part of His plan for your sanctification. Submit to the plan. It’s a good plan.
The Scriptures do not allow for us to design a plan for following Jesus that excludes His Bride. Share on X
If you need help finding a local body of believers where the Word is faithfully preached, start here.
Photo by Cassidy Kelley on Unsplash
Glenna Marshall is married to her pastor, William, and lives in rural Southeast Missouri where she tries and fails to keep up with her two energetic sons. She is the author of The Promise is His Presence (P&R) and Everyday Faithfulness (Crossway), and Memorizing Scripture (Moody). Connect with her on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter.